Yo solo queria hacer un comentario...

Here and now...

2009-10-25T01:50:00.000-07:00

It’s been more than two months since the last time I posted something and as usual, I only write when there is something wrong with my life. How dramatic uh? Let’s get this straight, I am mad. I am sad and angry and I can’t change that right now. It’s that so hard to understand? Do we need to be happy and smiley all the time? I have the right to get angry sometimes, right? A lot of has changed since my last post. I went from I have all figured out to I have no idea of what is going to be. I don’t want you to think I’m trying to sound like the victim or anything like that; as a matter of fact, I don’t like feeling that way, but if anybody else asks me: what’s wrong? Again, I swear to god I will kill myself! (Okay, no!) But anyway, why do people feel like I own them an explanation? It’s not like is anybody’s business but me. I don’t like talking about this, the reason I don’t like it, is because I start crying as soon as I begin, and I don’t like it when people see me cry. (How many likes have I used? I don’t care) I know crying doesn’t make me weak, but I’m just tired of people thinking that I need to be handled with care or something (and by people I mean you). Yes, I’m alone now. Yes, I spent the last 5 years of my life building castles in the sky. Yes, I’m anxious and nervous, and scared about what’s next. Yes, I will probably spend my favorite time of the year without my favorite person. Yes, I have to start all over again. Yes, I miss you. Yes, but I know is temporary.

Back from the land of still time

2009-08-02T01:46:00.000-07:00

The following dialogue is an excerpt from a conversation between a cousin, me, and my nana at my grandparent’s home:

...

Me: What time is it?

Cousin: I don’t know, 6 or 7 pm maybe?

Me: The living room clock says its 3:35

(Me thinking: 3:35 it’s obviously not accurate so I go and take a look at the dining room clock)

Me: hmmm… Its 12:40 in the dining room clock.

Cousin: hahaha! Check your cell phone.

(Me thinking: its a good idea to check the kitchen clock too, just in case)

Me: I guess I’ll have too… (Looking at the kitchen clock telling me that its 8:55)

(Nana gets into the room)

Me: nana, I’ve wandered around the house trying to find out what time it is; what’s with the clocks in this house?

Nana: I kind of forget to put new batteries in them.

Me: In all of them?

Nana: hmmm… has the bus of the factory workers passed down the road yet?

Cousin: No that I’ve seen.

Nana: The bus usually passes between 5:30 and 6:00pm; if it hasn’t arrived it’s probably around 5:00pm...

(I finally go to the bedroom, open my purse, turn my cell phone on, and finally discover that is 5:35pm, I don’t have my cell phone on, because we don’t have signal over there).

Me: its 5:35! (yelling from the bedroom because my nana and cousin are in the front porch)

Nana: Yes, we know, the bus just passed by!

I took a little vacation to my grandparents’ house. I don’t think I need to explain any further how is it that time isn’t really an issue when you are there. In a land where busses give you the time, rosters wake you up, and hunger tells you when its lunch time, there is not much place for stress. The days that I spend there are like a trip to limbo, but, in a nice way, I have to clarify. When you live in the city, you are ruled by a schedule, when you go to nana’s home, you are not ruled at all. You do what you please. You spend the time chatting, drinking coffee; eating cheese that grandpa did with his own hands, taking fruit from the trees, and chatting a little more. You just sit outside the house and watch people go by. You say goodbye to everyone, even if you have no idea of who they are. The days are long and peaceful; and time stays still, for you to appreciate life a little better.

Peace of mind equals no inspiration

2009-07-25T23:42:00.000-07:00

No Doubt - Just A Girl
Cargado por No-Doubt. - Videos de música, entrevistas a los artistas, conciertos y más.

It seems like I get more inspired when I’m sad, troubled or depressed. That can’t be good. Happiness should be the biggest inspiration, right? But I have a theory. The thing is that, you get sad, troubled, or depressed, when you have too much spare time in your hands. If you are busy, or you have frequent activities to keep your mind occupied your brain stays away from the dark side, at least until your next period comes (Are you a man? Never mind, you’ll never know).

If you know me, or if you start reading old posts, you will notice that the darkest time in my life was last summer. I was unemployed, heart broken, and broken as well, as in no-money- at-all bankrupt. I think I got to the point where I needed professional help, but I refused to go and seek for it. I’m sorry and forever grateful with the friends and family that helped me go trough that rough path (You know who).

Things in my life improved and I have been on a rollercoaster of emotions ever since. As any normal person, I think. But nothing has been as difficult as those gloomy times. This summer has been totally different. I know, I know, summer its not over yet, and you can not get anything for granted, but I know the things that happen to me last year won’t come over to haunt me again. I am wiser now, I am prepared, but most of all, I am stronger than last year me.

This week was kind of eventful. That’s why, after almost a month with no posting at all I decided to sit and analyze what I experienced in the past days. I learned a lot about people and myself. I discovered that I, as many people have told me, am kind of naive, but I'm certainly not stupid. I tried to achieve “world peace” and I got war in return. I don’t mind, it had to happen that way. I found out that truth and secrets always find their way out. I learned that without wanting, trying, or expecting, you eventually get to see people’s true colors. It took almost a year for lie to be exposed, but when it finally surfaced, it helped me put the pieces of this puzzle called friendship in the correct place.

In conclusion, friends are people, people are not perfect. You have a lifetime to discover which ones are worthy and which ones are not… so worthy. Either way, you’ll have to take the risk and trust to find out. But, as any other thing in life, follow your instincts. Your mind knows better that your heart sometimes, but your instincts never lie; we just don’t listen as often as we should.

2009-07-10T18:09:00.000-07:00

I watched this really stupid, corny show, where 40 couples of brides and grooms got married at the same time, after losing their entire budget for their wedding in some hurricane disaster in Texas. I found myself moved and almost cried along with the brides and bride’s moms. And then I understood why. I’ve always said “I don’t really care about the wedding” “A big party is a huge waste of money” and some other very anti-romantic stuff. Turns out, deep inside me, I do want a wedding. I want the fairy tale too. I want to stress over dress size and flower combinations too. I want to struggle to decide which song represents us better, to dance in our first husband and wife dance. I want to choose maid of honor, and bride’s maids, and flower girl. I want my dad to walk me down the aisle. I want to worry about the food catering, the never enough drink, and the cake. I want something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. I secretly want the whole experience. I do…

Off-wok to Do list:

2009-06-30T17:42:00.000-07:00

1. Rest: It is my intention to stay up late and sleep until noon, or later.
2. Love: With no commitments other than enjoying my free time, it is of great importance that I find varied and creative ways of seeing my loved one. (Meaning: not only movies, rented videos, and out to dinner).
3. Go out: This aspect involves family, boyfriend, friends, and Shopping sprees.
4. Get extra cash: Finding the way of getting some extra cash has been in my mind for quite some time now. The rule is, whatever the activity is, has to be completely unrelated to my actual job, that means, no classes, lessons, tutoring, or anything academic.
5. Renew my passport: I said I’ll do it as soon as I was on summer vacation, and they are here. Now I have all the time in the world to run errands, get the paperwork done; get appointments at any hour of the day, and whatever it takes to get my passport renewed.
6. Go to the beach: Get rid of the pale skin, please!
7. Gym: The goal is to be able to wear a bikini without feeling like Shamu. Be persistent and do whatever is not too unhealthy, in order to achieve it.
8. Meet with friends: Leave the antisocial tendencies and meet with friends at least two times a week.
9. Doctor Check out: This one is going to be difficult. The point is that I have to do it. I have the really bad habit of not going to the doctor unless I’m feeling really, really, sick; and I get sick every two years or so…

to be updated later...

OneRepublic - Stop And Stare

2009-06-28T22:01:00.000-07:00

This is the song of the week. Can't stop listening to it, I really don't get the video, but anyway... here is from OneRepublic, Youtube, and me; to you...

Where is miss Anabell...?

2009-06-25T22:32:00.000-07:00

These are my students, my almost ex-students. They made me happy, angry, desperate, laugh, distracted, worry, scream, learn, understand, care, love, and yes, they made me cry too. There is something special about each of them, no matter how much they made me lose my patience, I will always remember them. Graduation is almost here guys, I wish you nothing but the best!

Happy Father's Day!

2009-06-21T15:33:00.001-07:00

Working hard…or, hardly working?

2009-06-09T23:18:00.001-07:00

The laziest days ever! Almost vacations, there is not much left to do. The hard work is done, it's time to lay back, and relax...

I'm yours...

2009-06-08T01:06:00.000-07:00



I'm Yours-Jason Maraz

Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it 
I tried to be chill but your so hot that I melted 
I fell right through the cracks, now I'm tryin to get back 
before the cool done run out I'll be givin it my best test 
and nothin's gonna stop me but divine intervention 
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some 

But I won't hesitate no more, 
no more, it cannot wait 
I'm yours 

Well open up your mind and see like me 
open up your plans and damn you're free 
look into your heart and you'll find love love love love 
listen to the music at the moment people dance and sing with me 
Were just 1 big family
And it's our godforsaken right to be loved loved loved loved loved 

So, i won't hesitate no more, 
no more, it cannot wait i'm sure 
there's no need to complicate our time is short 
this is our fate
I'm yours...♫

Never say never...

2009-06-04T10:43:00.000-07:00

"This time is permanent...", "We are not getting back together...", "This time is over...". I guess the ending of the story is still unwritten. We are back!

Distracción

2009-05-30T23:58:00.000-07:00

Distraction, aberration, abstraction, agitation, amusement, bewilderment, commotion, complication, confusion, disorder, dissipation, disturbance, diversion, divertissement, engrossment, entertainment, frenzy, interference, interruption, pastime, preoccupation, recreation...

"No importa"

2009-05-27T23:45:00.000-07:00

Es todo palabrería y actuación. No importa cuanto se diga y se actué como si nada, no importa que tan muertos estábamos, no importa que tanto se había apagado; duele. Duele y no se puede evitar. El tratar de ser fuerte solo ayuda cuando los demás te ven, pero tu sabes que es lo que hay adentro. No hay día que no se piense en el hubiera hecho esto y aquello, y el hubiera no existe. Y peleo. Peleo conmigo misma para odiarte, y busco motivos para olvidarte, y todas las razones del mundo para borrarte. Y no importa, nada cambia. Porque no hay motivos suficientes para eliminarte, porque no importa cuanto trate, eres parte de mi historia.

It'll all get better in time...

2009-05-25T14:57:00.000-07:00

Better In Time
It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going coming thought I heard a knock
Who's there no one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realize that I really didn't know
If you didn't notice
you mean everything
Quickly I'm learnin'
To love again
All I know is
I'm gon' be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something that'd remind me
Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming
Don't wanna let that hurt my feelings
But that's the path I've been living
And I know that time will heal it
If you didn't notice boy you meant everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gon' be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me
It's time I let you go so I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I'll be fine without you
Yes I will

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time...

Outta here...

2009-05-21T21:20:00.000-07:00

There's so much to do, and nothing gets done! I've been procrastinating this and that, and a whole lot of work continues getting stored in the cold case file. It seems like my involuntary vacations have taken my drive and my sense of responsibility with them. Where did my batteries go? I need some motivation, I don't know where I left it. I must have lost it somewhere along the way...

Teacher's day @ Kino bay

2009-05-16T13:56:00.001-07:00

Relax, take it easy
For there is nothing that we can do.
Relax, take it easy
Blame it on me or blame it on you (8)

Day # 2

2009-05-05T20:18:00.000-07:00

Today is my second day in this journey called DIET. It has been one of the best 2^nd diet days I remember. Every time that I decided to start a diet I would start craving for junk food by noon of day #1. I usually don't eat a lot, and I actually skip meals, which is like the biggest sin in loosing weight; but when I'm on diet I'm hungry all the time, and I forget about it after three or four days. Today has been great because I haven't been hungry, I didn't get the classic diet headache, I wasn't grumpy, or any of other annoying side effects. I'm making my diet public because I want to follow it for more than a week this time. I want to carry on with it and see some results on my body.

Another positive aspect on my road to thinness is that I'm exercising too. I joined the gym almost a month ago, and I've been feeling great about that too. For the first time in my life I felt comfortable at the gym. A lot of it has to do with the fact that is a women only gym, but I love the way the trainers and the staff made me feel. They were very friendly from day one, they paid a lot of attention to my personal needs, I they really encourage you to follow the plan and achieve your goals. The atmosphere is very relaxed and I actually like going. YES, I enjoy going to the gym, doesn't feel like something I HAVE to do, more like something I LOVE to do.

This is the end of the self-evaluation on day # 2, so far so good…

“Choosing a goal and sticking to it changes everything”.
Scott Reed

Este dia en la historia...

2009-05-03T12:33:00.000-07:00

Un día como hoy, pero de 1988, nació la personita que tengo enseguida en esta “no muy poco embarazosa foto”. La primera de mis dos hermanas. La compañera que ha estado a mi lado por más tiempo. La que sabe cosas de mí que nadie más sabe. Con la que he tenido Un millón de peleas y discusiones, y Siete millones de momentos divertidos. Con la que he reído, llorado, peleado, golpeado, gritado, jugado, dormido, viajado, cantado, bailado, comido, enfermado, construido, inventado, visto, sufrido, perdido, explorado, bañado, etc., etc. La única persona con la que se, que si hay conflicto, por mas feo que se ponga, todo vuelve a la normalidad después de unas horas. La que me ha aguantado y acompañado en mis momentos mas oscuros y poco agradables. La que se que siempre estará ahí, porque para eso es que son las hermanas, quieran o no quieran!

¡Feliz cumpleaños hermana! Te quiero mucho, aunque lo diga poco…

Save the piggies!

2009-05-02T13:24:00.000-07:00

Can people catch swine flu from eating pork?
No. Swine influenza viruses are not transmitted by food. You can not get swine influenza from eating pork or pork products. Eating properly handled and cooked pork and pork products is safe. Cooking pork to an internal temperature of 160°F kills the swine flu virus as it does other bacteria and viruses.
http://www.cdc.gov/h1n1flu/key_facts.htm

No hay que dejarse "influenzar"

2009-04-30T12:08:00.000-07:00

2009-04-30T00:31:00.000-07:00

Little miss forgetful did it again

2009-04-29T21:52:00.000-07:00

Where is my fucking mind when I need it? I don’t loose my head because it’s attached to my neck. What am I going to be like when I’m old? Am I just going to forget breathing one day? I know, I know, I’m exaggerating… Could it be that I’m a weird case of early Alzheimer? Whatever, the thing is that I keep forgetting important things with significant consequences. And it doesn’t seem to get any better. I mean, my long term memory its damn good but, my short term memory really sucks! I need brain vitamins or something.

p.s. what was I saying?

Paranoia

2009-04-27T22:26:00.000-07:00

Paranoia: \per-ə-noi-ə, pa-rə-\ ̇

1: a psychosis characterized by systematized delusions of persecution or grandeur usually without hallucinations.

2: a tendency on the part of an individual or group toward excessive or irrational suspiciousness and distrustfulness of others.

So what? We are all going to die someday.

Am I ready to die right now? I don’t think so.

Will I be ready to die someday? I hope so…

I don’t like being afraid to death; after all is the only thing for sure in life.

What would I like to do before dying?

Tell my parents and sisters I love you other than on Christmas, birthdays, and other holidays.
Get married, and have two or three children half him, half me.
Write a novel.
Taking art lessons, from painting, to sculpture, to theater.
Dare to sing in a karaoke bar.
Dare to wear a bikini.
Take a trip to an unusual place.
Ride the highest rollercoaster in the world.
Invent something amazing and become rich from its patent and massive production.
I don’t know what else, some other ideas will probably come later, and I’m off to bed now!

P.s. The order of the factors might alter the product…

Bowling on lazy Sunday

2009-04-13T18:17:00.000-07:00

Look into my eyes - you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart - search your soul
And when you find me there you'll search no more

Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for
You know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

Look into your heart - you will find
There's nothin' there to hide
Take me as I am - take my life
I would give it all - I would sacrifice

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for
I can't help it - there's nothin' I want more
Ya know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

There's no love - like your love
And no other - could give more love
There's nowhere - unless you're there
All the time - all the way

Oh - you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
I can't help it - there's nothin' I want more
I would fight for you - I'd lie for you
Walk the wire for you - yeah I'd die for you

You know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you...

Si fuera...

2009-04-10T12:40:00.001-07:00

Si fuera una fruta sería: limón real

Si fuera un color sería: verde

Si fuera un animal sería: Catarina

Si fuera un día sería: viernes

Si fuera un electrodoméstico sería: cafetera

Si fuera un cuento infantil sería: La Sirenita

Si fuera una prenda sería: Zapatos

Si fuera una joya sería: collar

Si fuera bebida sería: Limonada

Si fuera un helado sería: Durazno

Si fuera un planeta sería: Venus

Si fuera un medio de transporte sería: Globo aerostatito

Si fuera una película sería: El señor de los anillos

Si fuera una estación sería: otoño

Si fuera una flor sería: Tulipán

Si fuera un dibujo animado sería: Bombón

Si fuera un sentido sería: olfato

Si fuera un juego sería: “Malía“

Si fuera una parte del cuerpo sería: mano

Si fuera un sabor sería: Tutti-frutti

Si fuera un deporte sería: Patinaje

Si fuera un mes sería: Diciembre

Si fuera una figura geométrica sería: Triangulo

Si fuera un instrumento musical sería: Guitarra